Sometimes I don't think that all the money, pain, and time I invest in cycling is worth it, not when it seems like it creates strains in other areas of my life. Right now I'm at a point where I'd almost just rather quit than to try and juggle all the time and needs of cycling around my family life. I also have really bad knees, especially the left one, that give me constant pain that is becoming more difficult to deal with and I'm not sure I want to deal with that anymore. I have been really motivated to ride this year and really want to race but a lot of other things aren't getting done because of the time I have to, or want to spend riding. My wife is in nursing school right now and between working part time, classes, studying, and clinicals which start in two weeks, she is really not available to help out as much as she used to. I have to take up a lot of the slack at home and taking our son to his activities and making dinner and all that good stuff. It's difficult to take care of that stuff and then have to ride at 8:00 at night until 10:00 or 10:30 and then get to bed at a reasonable time.
Basically it's just a matter of not enough hours in the day and the fact that I've made cycling a priority and neglected other things. I'm sure I can fix the knee issue eventually so I'm not too worried about that, although last night was difficult to ride. I did manage 2 hours on the trainer but my left knee was hurting pretty bad, I rode just to spite the pain, and was pretty much pissed off the whole time I rode because I can't get rid of it. It's all starting to wear on me a bit and I've got some decisions to make. I'm not sure I'm going to bike the rest of the week, I just need to catch up on a few things around the house, maybe I'll re-evaluate things next week and see where to go from there. Until next time.............
2 comments:
With all the time you've put in, you're feeling the stresses of trying to make up a lot of ground between where you were years ago and where you want to be. I've questioned how you stay motivated putting forth that much effort. Taking some time off will be the breather you need so just do it. I know one thing you've been trying to do is get your weight down so keep after that plan because it's easy to do without clipping a single foot in a pedal. You're still way ahead of the game so find that balance you need in order to keep your sanity and you'll be ready once the season comes along. Remember, it's supposed to be fun so if it's seeming more like a job, that a good sign to back it down a notch. Hang in there...we want to see you in the old guy 3's.
Thanks Scott, motivation is not a problem for me, I have all the desire to ride. Like you said though I may have put more of a burden on myself to "catch-up" to where I was than is probably needed. My main problem right now is just time, so I'm going to try to play catch-up this weekend and get things done. I need to rest my knee as well. I'll hopefully be ready to go next week. Trust me, I want to be with the old guys 3s pretty quickly, so no worries.
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